Hugh

9 Months Old

Sometimes I have to stop and wonder where the last nine months have gone. Hugh is such a delightful baby. He's so smart and clever, and is developing his personality before our eyes. He's very laid-back and chill, but when he wants something, he's got a fierce personality and has determination within him that I've never seen in someone so young.

Hugh loves each of his family members in unique ways. He loves spending time with his mama and is all smiles for his daddy, but he absolutely LOVES his big brother. 

Gus loves Hugh too and as Hugh has gotten older and bigger, he's becoming more fun for Gus to play with. Gus loves to give "Chew" something and then try to take it away from him to get a reaction. Hugh, of course, flips out when someone takes something that he's got. It's amazing that in just nine months, our family has morphed into one where the two children interact and play and I'm often heard saying, "Gus... leave your brother alone!!"

Hugh has been seeing a physical therapist (PT) for the past month and has been making great gains with her support. Every time she comes to work with him (once a week for an hour), she leaves and he picks up what they were working on. In the short time that they've been working together, he's hit multiple milestones, including: rolling from belly to back and back to belly (part of why he qualified for PT was because he wasn't rolling), going from laying to sitting on his own, crawling, standing unassisted (not holding anything and just standing up in the middle of the room), and cruising.

The position that Hugh is in quite often
 

 Standing on his own!

 Learning to crawl up stairs (Gus was doing this at 5 months)

While Hugh is making great progress, we've been concerned about his ankle/legs and so we took him on Monday to be casted for ankle braces. He should have them in three weeks. His orthotist was very amazed at how calm and good Hugh was during the casting. He said most babies his age need to be sedated in order to be casted, because they cannot handle it. Hugh was totally fine.

This morning we have an appointment with the pediatric neurologist. I'm not going to lie, I'm really nervous about this one. When we took him to Babies Can't Wait, they all agreed that he needed to be seen by a pediatric neurologist for the tremors and extreme rigidity of his muscles. Gus's former OT, Mary, also suggested he see a pediatric neurologist, and Hugh's PT suggested it as well. Our doctor wasn't as concerned and while she wrote the referral, she wasn't overly concerned about the tremors.

I'm not sure what'll happen today (if anything). They may just look him over and then want him to come back for more testing. I'll post more after today.

My Birthday

Ten years ago today, I turned 27. My life was completely different from what it is today (as it should be). 

I was living at 1021 Washtenaw with Beckie and Maylone, living next to Krissy, Shannon, and Jess. My days were spent teaching third grade at Redner, and I was somewhat single.

My 27th birthday was spent with friends and we went to the bar to celebrate. I didn't know that my 27th year would lead me down a path that would forever change who I was.

In my 27th year, I made serious financial decisions for myself, I spoke to my ex-husband for the last time ever, and I met Steve. We bought a house together and moved in with each other. 

It's amazing to think that it's almost been ten years since meeting Steve. The lifestyle that I was living ten years ago is unthinkable to me today.

I had a day that got better and better as the day progressed. I am so very blessed to have people in my life that love me.

I was sad to be spending my birthday alone... And instead I went to dinner with great friends. They brightened my day and made me feel loved and special.

I came home and fave Gus a bath and then was visited by another good friend. She brought me a special present and homemade cookies that she and her son made for me. :-)

At 9:15 Steve walked in the door from his trip to NYC. The best gift of the day! He even gave me a card (and a card from the boys) and a new lens for my camera!!

I talked to my mom and dad, my oldest brother, and my twin brother. 

It was a wonderful birthday!

Posted using BlogPress from my fabulous iPhone

Adoption Adoption Adoption

Lately, the topic of adoption (with strangers) has come up quite frequently. I've been asked to tell our adoption story numerous times, been asked numerous questions (some quite personal), and at the end of each time that I've shared, the same thing has been said, "Oh, I had no idea that he was adopted."

As you know, I've got two boys and they are BOTH adopted. One looks very similar to my husband and the other looks very similar to me. This was not done on purpose (yes, this has been asked). When we adopted Gus, we had been praying for several years for a baby. The ability to conceive was just not something that was in the cards and we didn't want to go through expensive IVF treatments that were not guaranteed. So we prayed and pursued domestic newborn adoption.

Gus was the answer to many prayers and came after an abundance of tears that no one deserves to shed. The pain of infertility is something that unless you've been through it, you cannot fathom how hard it is. Every pregnancy announcement hurts. Every picture of friends basking in the glow of becoming parents, is difficult to look at. Infertility isn't something that many openly discuss, and it's not something that the majority of the public fully understands or sincerely empathizes about.

Hugh was a different story. We wanted to adopt again and wanted a second child, but we were lost as to how it would go. We felt like we were so blessed with Gus's adoption, and that it appeared out of no where for us, that surely, we would never get that lucky again. When Hugh's birth mother contacted me and began to talk, I still didn't think anything of it. When a few weeks had passed and we matched "officially" it was unreal. 

I know for certain that Hugh was brought into our lives for a reason and he IS a gift from God, as his older brother is as well. Both of my children came from above, and they fill my life with so much joy, awe, wonder, and appreciation. I don't take them for granted and I KNOW how blessed we are.

Recently, we've had to do some medically-related things with Hugh. He's only nine months, but we've been going to appointments, meeting with teams of professionals to evaluate him, and each time, the fact that he's adopted comes up. And each time, comments are made that paint the wrong picture.

Comments are made like, "Just think about how lucky he is to have you taking care of him." While I'm sure that comment isn't said with much thought behind the reality of the words, the truth is, WE are the lucky ones. We didn't rescue him for a horrible life. We didn't "save him" from anything. He was brought into our lives for a reason and that reason comes from above.

While talking to various people about his background and family history (which is commonly asked when going to the doctor/pediatrician), for some of it, I have to say "Unknown" because 1/2 of his history will always be unknown. It is what it is, we can't change it, and it's just a fact. But when we write "Unknown" the questions start flowing.

People think they have the right to just ask personal questions, so they just let them fly out of their mouths. "Why is his history unknown?" "Oh... his mother didn't know the guy she was sleeping with?" "His real father wasn't involved with his mother?" "Oh, his mom didn't know the guy that got her pregnant?"

Seriously. 

I think the one thing that I've learned most after adopting Hugh is that you DO NOT know from outward appearances what someone has going on in their life. The outward signs might create one picture, but the honest truth is that you do not know what someone is going through or has gone through. 

I get so upset and frustrated when people assume bad things about Hugh's birth mother. I will not share details of his history, but she is and amazing, wonderful, beautiful, incredible individual. 

People are just dumb.

In my MOMS Club, we've had a lot of new people join and as we're getting to know each other at playgroup and MNO (moms' night out) events, the topic of our kids often comes up. I've shared that my kids are adopted and with that, always comes a lot of questions. To be honest, I love talking about adoption and our story and I love sharing how our family was created. I am proud to be an adoptive mom and am open to talking to others about it.

It's when ignorant comments are said, that I shutter and then think that people really have no clue. People don't know about open adoption, they don't understand how we could be actively pursuing relationships with both of our sons' extended families. "Aren't you worried they'll want to come back and take them?" Yes, I've been asked that one.

I guess the only way to educate people is to share my truth and my story, and hope that they'll learn from it. Adoption isn't like shows that you see on television. Even shows like "I'm Having their Baby" and "The Baby Wait" (which we were asked to be part of) have been edited for television.

As much as I love adoption and love that we're a family created by adoption, sometimes I get sick of talking about it. I'd love to be able to just talk about my kids and not have to answer questions about their "real" moms. Again, offended by the term "real" as I am their "real" mom-- I'm not fake! 

I hate the look of shock and pity that often comes when someone learns that they are adopted. I don't know which is worse, the look after hearing that Gus is adopted (because he's Caucasian, blonde, and blue eyed), or Hugh (he's multi-racial, dark hair, olive skin, and brown eyed). Adoptive families all look different. Families that are not created by adoption also look different. I hate when I hear (after learning that Hugh is adopted), "Ohhh... that makes sense. Yeah, he looks nothing like you."  Thanks for that.

Adoption is becoming more and more "the norm" and more common. People see it in the media more and more and I think it's more accepted than it used to be. It's not a taboo subject today, like it was years ago. But a lot of what people know about adoption isn't accurate, and a lot of it is still misunderstood.

I think because we've been in this world for over three years, we see it differently than the general public does. I sometimes forget that people haven't taken classes, read books, and talked and talked and talked about adoption like I have. 

Instead of rolling my eyes, shaking my head, and coming back with snide comments, I listen to people make ignorant comments about adoption and my children, and I take a deep breath, and I politely share our truth (usually). Some comments are ignored, and some are not. 

Then I pray that God will continue to help me muster through each day and face it with strength, wisdom, and purpose. 

Crack Casserole

Yummmmm

One of our favorite comfort meals is something we call "Crack Casserole." It's called that because once you've had it, you're hooked and want more and more, just as if you were on crack. Tacky title for a recipe? Probably.

Anyway, my good friend Shannon recently texted me and asked for the recipe. Since I make it often, I thought about checking my blog and just sending her the link, but to my surprise, I had not (yet) blogged this recipe. I had just bought the items to make CC this week anyway, so I told her I'd take pics and blog the recipe and send her the link.

I've seen this made with potato chips (instead of french onions) on top too. 

Without further ado, here is the recipe (with step by step pictures) of one of our favorite recipes.

There's the "official" recipe

 I add the 1/4 cup mayo and 1/4 cup sour cream first

 Then I add 3/4 bag of shredded cheese

 Then the 1/2 can of COM soup. **REMEMBER only 1/2 can** I made the mistake of dumping the whole can once and it was way too rich. It's 1/2 can for a reason!

 Then water chestnuts (you can omit if you don't like WCs but they add a really nice crunch to the finished product)

 Roughly five stalks of celery

 Whole Rotisserie Chicken- This one was maple bourbon flavored and was yummy. Original or something hearty would be good- avoid lemon flavored though.

 Start removing all the meat off the RC. My kitties enjoy this part the most. >^..^<

 This is what you'll get off one RC. Then you chop up the meat and add it to the bowl

 Everything's in (except for the Fried Onions)-- you mix with a spoon so everything is evenly mixed

 Put everything in a casserole dish (or glass dish/pan)

 Add a little cheese (not all the remaining cheese-- just a little) and a handful of fried onions

 It bakes for 40 minutes (UNCOVERED)- It'll look like this.

 Then I add the rest of the cheese and the remaining amount of fried onions and bake for another 5 minutes

 After the five minutes are up, remove and let it cool for 10 minutes

Enjoy! You can top it with a dollop of sour cream, add ketchup to it, or just enjoy it as it is.