Open Adoption Roundtable #37

 

OAR #37: How Do You Feel After A Visit?

I have to say that when we first started our open adoption, I was so nervous to have our first visit with Gus's birth mother's family and his birth father's family (we did separate visits when we first visited). Each of the first visits went extremely well and everyone seemed to be in love with Gus. 

We decided that it's a lot to try to visit my side of our family AND separately visit Gus's side of our family. Since his birth mother and father are still together, we decided to ask if it would be possible to meet all of them in one visit, instead of breaking it up into two separate visits. We were delighted when they all agreed that a gathering for the day would work.

Our first visit with everyone was in August of 2011. Gus was just over a year and we decided to celebrate his birthday too. His Great Aunt and Uncle offered their island house for us to use, and everyone gathered at their place. It was amazing.

We walked away from that first united visit and we were elated. We are going back to MI next month and we'll be celebrating his 2nd birthday with everyone again. I'm expecting a great visit and I can't wait for his entire birth family to see how much he's grown since August! 

After each visit with his birth family, I am so overjoyed. I feel like God placed us all together for a reason and I see them as an extension of my family. They're all wonderful, and I feel like we're as close to them as some of our own biological family members. I love seeing them with Gus, and I love that I have pictures of them all together. These are memories that he probably won't remember, but I want him to never not know them. They're who he is, and are as essential as we are in his life.

I always say a prayer of thanks after we see them and hope that the next visit will come soon.