A Bad Playdate :-(

It was bound to happen eventually, but I didn't think it would be as awful as it was. We went to a playdate this morning with my AAM group and I totally went into it with my guard down. I wasn't nervous, thought it was going to be fun. It was the opposite.

We got there at 10:30 and there were three other moms there including the mom who was hosting. She was very friendly and welcoming, and when we went in, I thought to myself, "This is going to be fun." 

Dina had texted me to tell me that she wasn't going and then I saw that Heather (the only other mom that I had already met) took her name off the list. I decided to still go and meet some new moms. I wish I had stayed home.

When we walked into the play area, there were two moms there talking... I had to introduce myself to them as they didn't stop their conversation to introduce themselves to me. No big deal... but then they kept talking and neither talked to me.

Weird.

Then another mom showed up, and the two that were in the conversation knew her, exchanged hugs, and then the three of them started talking. The one that came in just after me never introduced herself to me and didn't ask who I was. It was almost as if she didn't see me... I was invisible.

Then ANOTHER mom came... and she didn't really talk to anyone either, but she sat on the floor and eventually started talking to the other three... then the hostess came in and she asked me a few questions and tried to include me on the conversation that she was having with one of the other moms, but I still wasn't "in" on the convo. 

It was horrible. Being new and not knowing anyone, I naturally was more on the shy side and more of an observer, but it was really painful. I wanted to just get up and leave after just 15 minutes. Gus was Gus... walking around and playing with all the new toys and oblivious to what the adults were doing. There were quite a few older kids there (ages 3-4) and it was weird to see the bigger kids... while I'm sure they're great, I totally prefer playdates with kids Gus's age. 

There was a little boy named Ian (he's the hostess's son) and he was 17 months. He was very little and I was surprised that he was only three months younger than Gus... he acted much younger. IDK... then there was a 15 month old and he was cute and the three little little ones played on one side of the room while the bigger kids played on the other. It was sorta funny.

Anyway, while I wasn't ignored the ENTIRE time, I was left out and felt really stupid sitting there watching these strangers have their conversation. They talked about other moms that I don't know, and preschools, and stuff that I have no clue about. It was just like being invited into a world that I clearly don't fit into or belong in.

I think the fact that no one asked me who I was, who was Gus... it just was really odd. The one was the area co-moderator and while I'd never met her, I have talked to her on the forum... so I "knew" her without knowing her. She was the only one that talked to me and like I said, it was for a minute.

When it was 11:45, some of the moms started to get lunches out for their kids and I decided it was time to leave. The hostess said, "Are you sure you're going to leave? We are about to have lunch." I told her that I was going to take Gus home for lunch and then put him down for a nap. She said, "You can have lunch here..." and I said, "No... I don't think so." I felt bad saying it like that, but my God... I needed to get the hell outta there.

I got Gus and I told him to say his goodbyes... he waved goodbye and I thanked the hostess for having us... she said it was nice to meet me and then I walked out. 

NO
ONE
ELSE
SAID
ANYTHING

Not one other person said goodbye to us. Not one other person said it was nice to meet me. Not one other person thanked me for joining them today.

It was so horrible. 

So now I'm torn... I thought I was really going to love AAM... all my interactions have been so good... they planned a trip to the zoo for me for Pete's sake!! I've really liked everyone that I've met so far... and our area group is very small... I thought I was going to "gel" with everyone.

Now I'm not so sure. The people that I do know and like, (I've actually met them) weren't there... so maybe I just go to things that they're at? I don't know...

On another note... one of the moms from MOMS Club emailed me and invited me to go to a women's Bible study with her. I explained that I'm Catholic and not looking for a new religion (except for maybe becoming an Orthodox Quaker- LMAO) and she said that there's no "selling" of religion. It's a mom's group and they talk about parenting and how the Bible comes into it.

It sounds really interesting to me so I said I'd go. I honestly believe that God presents us with opportunities for a reason. So it's every other week... and I told her I couldn't go today because of my playdate (BAD MOVE)... so in two weeks I'll join her.

I have been added to my MOMS Club playdate rotation schedule... and I have addresses for where the upcoming events will take place. I'm eager to go to the next one (they're every Monday) and see how it goes. I had fun this past Monday and so did Gus. Maybe my MOMS Club will be the right thing for me. I saw on their newsletter that they only have 18 moms... and I met seven already. LOL

We'll see... but for now I'm thankful to be home and in my happy place away from awkwardness and an uncomfortable position. I texted Dina on the way home and told her to be glad she wasn't there. She said the next one should be better (next Thursday). We'll see... if it isn't, I might be done with AAM.

Later!